O "radi reda" momentima /// About courtesy behaviours

* Scroll down for English version

(Jedan pomalo hejterski post...)

Jedna od stvari koja me najviše nervira u odraslom svetu su oni momenti kada nešto trebaš da uradiš zato što je "red", tj. "radi reda". Ne znaš svrhu tog zahteva, nemaš potrebu da ga ispuniš, ali "mora se" i "ništa ne pitaj".

Momak prvi prilazi devojci, red je. On plaća pića i prohteve devojci, red je. Devojka kuva i pegla, red je. (Ako nije red, onda ide ono objašnjenje: žensko je, što je još više besmisleno). Pa kad se posvađaju on/ona treba prvi/a da nazove, zato što tako mora! I onda na kraju raskinu jer su gubili vreme na inatno "tako treba, red je".

Kada vidiš malo dete red je reći da je slatko. Pa ne mogu. Nisu sve deca lepa i treba hrabrosti da se to prizna. Kada je neko tužan, rezigniran, valja reći "prestani da plačeš, biće sve u redu... nije tako strašno..". Pa možda u tom trenutku baš i jeste sve strašno, i možda nikad sve neće baš biti u najboljem redu.


A kada te neko ne voli, pa se sav obraduje kad te vidi, izljubi te ili govori "draga, ljubavi"? Čemu to licemerstvo?

Drugarica me podsetila na ono "izvini" radi reda. Izvini samo da bi se završio razgovor ili izvini da bi taj neko ispao čovek, i da bi se rangirao visoko u svojim očima. Iako se ne zna na šta tačno se to izvini odnosi. Rečima Izvini i Volim te jednostavno ne volim da se igram, i koristim ih onda kada ih zaista osećam.

Puno toga radi reda sam iskusila sada u pripremama za svadbu. Na pozivnicama ide prvo ime devojke pa muškarca - zar je to bitno? Trebalo bi zvati ovog, onog, red je. Pa kićenje, mladenačke pogače, i kojekakva druga radi reda čestitanja i prikupljanja novca... Još kada jadnim mladencima čestitaš 100x što su se venčali, pa im se usta ukoče od silnog ljubljenja gostiju. E baš neću takvu svadbu..


Radi reda u blog svetu. Red je da se prate svi blogovi koji ti ostave komentar, pa čak i oni čiji ti je autor ostavio bogat i zanimljiv komentar tipa "super blog. Hoćeš da se pratimo?" A najbolji su mi oni koji ti postave to pitanje, ali će krenuti da te prate tek kad vide da ti pratiš njih. Blog common courtesy - nisam baš za to. Postoje neki blogovi koje rado pratim, ali njihovim autorima verovatno ne odgovara koncepcija mog bloga, te ne uzvraćaju isto. I meni je to skroz ok. Šta bih ja dobila time da imam jednog više pratioca, kad bi on bio neko ko ne bi bio inspirisan mojim postovima, te ih ne bi ni komentarisao? Zar nije bit blogovanja u iznošenju mišljenja/impresija i diskutovanju istih sa drugima, a ne u skupljanju pratilaca koji neće ni čitati ono što napišeš?

Koji su vaši omiljeni "radi reda" momenti?

English version

(One a bit hating post)

One of the things that irritates me the most in the adult world is when you have to do something because it`s advisable to/it`s good to do it. You don`t know the point, you don`t have the need to do it, but you "have to and "don`t ask anything".

The guy should approach to girl first. And than buy her drinks, buy dinners, clothes, etc. The girls is the one who is cooking, ironing, it should be like that. (If it should`t, than there goes that "she`s a female, that`s why", which is even more ridicilous.) And when they fight, both of them don`t call the other one, because he/she is the one who should call first. And then in the end they break up because no one called, and the were wasting their time on that "should/it`s supposed to".

When you see a little child, you should say it`s sweet. Well, I can`t. Not every child is cute, and one should have courage to admit that.When someone is sad, resignated, it`s advisable to say "don`t cry, everything will be alright.. It`s not that bad.." to him/her. Well, maybe IT IS that bad in that moment, and maybe not everything won`t be alright in the end.

Ad when someone don`t like you, but smiles and kisses when he/she sees you and is like "heeeey, it`s so nice to see you.. dear..." What`s with the hypocrisy?

My friend reminded me of that courtesy "sorry". Sorry just to finish the conversation or sorry just so that person could be high in ones eyes. Even though he/she doesn`t know what that sorry refers to. I simply don`t like to play with words such as Sorry and I love you, and use them only when I really feel like it.

A lot of  "courtesy behaviours" I have experienced in my wedding preparation. You should put bride name first on the invitations, and then the grooms. Does it matter anyway? You should call this person, that one, it`s should be like that. Then all those rituals on the weddings (at least in Serbia) when you are gathering money from guest for all kinds of "it should" activities. And when you congratulate the newlyweds a 1000 times, and than they get swollen mouth from all the kissing. Well, my wedding would be nothing like that.

"You should" moments in blog world. You should follow all that leave you comment, even though some of them left you a comment like "great blog. Wanna follow each other?" And the best ones are those who first ask that question, and follow you only when you start to follow them. Blog common courtesy - I`m not into it. There are some blogs that I like to follow, but their authors don`t follow me. And it`s ok, and good. What would I do if they were following me, but wouldn`t read my posts because they are obviously not interested in that?  Isn`t the purpose of the blog to give the opinion/impressions/inspiration and to discuss them with the ones interested, and not just to collect followers who wouldn`t even read your posts?

What are your favourite "from courtesy" moments?

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